[This is written in English in the hope that my parents won’t
read it. Reader discretion advised as this might be fictional.]
4PM in the afternoon, this side of the office building becomes
quiet as time approaches 5. Our big boss, Rick, stopped by my desk and asked: ”Wei,
can you……”
After a few questions, he paused:
”Wei, let me ask you a question.”
“Yes?”
“Do you want to consider any oversea assignments?”
“Yes?” I was confused.
“You know, there are different kinds of people,” he tries to
explain. “Some love Houston and don’t want to leave. They want to get married,
have kids. But others like to move higher, make more money. You know.”
It’s a multinational company, usually overseas assignments
lead to promotion, and higher position in the management hierarchy, but the
down side is, there will be another few years of uncertainty in the life.
“For how long?” Still in surprise, I asked.
“6 months, maybe a year, maybe 3 years, or longer.” Rick
answered, expecting an answer.
“You know, there is one part of me inside telling me I am
over 30 and need to settle down, but there is another part always there,
wanting to see new things, experience new culture……” I know I am lying about
the second part as my mouth moves. “Why did you ask about this?” I decided to
find out why this came as a surprise.
“Some one from Paris
asked me if anyone is interested in any overseas assignment.” Rick replied. Paris is our company’s
headquarter. During this time of the year every company is working on 2008
budget, which means the position opening is already there, and will be filled
in 3 months.
“Oh. That sounds cool. I want to try it!” I lied again.
There is this one thing in the world called destiny, or
fate. I have been searching for years for my soul mate. I thought I found, I
failed, thought I found again, and failed again, then again, and again. I didn’t
believe in destiny, I believed in my ability to change destiny, but I have yet
been successful. The most outrageous joke to a person is, he found out he is
unable to do something he loves with his life, just like one dying to become a
painter find he is color blind. Now it’s time to admit I simply don’t have the
ability to grasp the chances. Now it’s time to sit back and tell myself: “No
life is perfect. You can’t have wife, family, kids with career and experience
all together.” After all, my career is still under my control.
Suddenly I realized I need to move on again. Leave my
apartment, leave my old and new friends, my car, my sadness, my happiness, and
my love behind.
Pack up seaman, it’s your life, your destiny.